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Amanda

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[14 Jan 2005|02:32pm]
[ mood | pessimistic ]

just so you all know ive moved to xClear_Heartsx
dont feel like explaining it all so just comment and i'll possibly add u there if i havent already
ty
<3
Amanda

p.s.
im not totally getting rid of this lj though just so u know - but dont count on me updating much here

Torture Me

No Compassion [13 Jan 2005|08:24pm]
[ mood | busy ]

\ by:Carbonmadeicons

52 Pleasure Victims_ Torture Me

[02 Oct 2004|10:57am]
hey everyone i just wanted to let u all know my computer is down and i cant talk for a while longer but i moved.. yes its a long story.. im in gainesville now and if u need to get a hold of me just call my cell 727 219 6101... sorry everyone ttyl bye
1 Pleasure Victims_ Torture Me

[15 Jul 2004|11:21am]


I Adopted Brian from MorbidBeauty.com
5 Pleasure Victims_ Torture Me

i love the 90s is tomorrow!!!! [11 Jul 2004|10:26pm]
[ mood | none of your buisness ]

im too aggrevated and tired to actually make a real update.. and no one really reads this anyways so i guess i might as well babble i was going to just bitch on here about something a friend of mine said/ did today. but i know i'll get over it. but i wont forget it. you wonder why its hard for me to tell u anything!!
god...
oh well.

-Amanda-

You are Lili St. Cyr!
You're Lili St. Cyr!


What Classic Pin-Up Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

2 Pleasure Victims_ Torture Me

random picture.. [10 Jul 2004|08:47pm]
[ mood | sore ]

The most gorgeous awesome actress ever :)
Angelina Jolie

1 Pleasure Victims_ Torture Me

a minor update before i skip off to work .. [09 Jul 2004|02:44pm]
[ mood | rushed ]

How to make a amanda
Ingredients:

3 parts pride

3 parts courage

5 parts instinct
Method:
Layer ingredientes in a shot glass. Add sadness to taste! Do not overindulge!


Username:


Personality cocktail
From Go-Quiz.com
and another...

What Is Your Best Sexual Skill?
Name:
Age:
Sex:
Sexuality:
Flirting Skill Level - 100%
Kissing Skill Level - 94%
Cudding Skill Level - 99%
Sex Skill Level - 73%
Why They Love You You know how to push their buttons.
Why They Hate You You bite.
This fun quiz by lady_wintermoon - Taken 215392 Times.
</a>
New - Kwiz.Biz Astrology and Horoscopes


voowala! (or however u spell it )
Well.. actually i dont really bite but i do scratch/claw ;)
i'll try to make a real update later
ta ta
p.s. my cell is back up for all of u that dont know
---- chrissy how's ur job going by the way??


-Amanda-
Torture Me

random picture [30 Jun 2004|02:28pm]
Alison Lohman
13 Pleasure Victims_ Torture Me

Tonight i cry with you, so high with you [30 Jun 2004|11:54am]
[ mood | confused ]


What will God say to you when you die?
Name
Age
Religion
You will say: What is the meaning of life?
He will say: I am whole-heartedly disappointed in you.
How much do you deserve to be in heaven? - 86%
This Quiz by megalomein - Taken 18125 Times.
</a>
New - Kwiz.Biz Astrology and Horoscopes
Torture Me

[28 Apr 2004|08:50pm]
[ mood | lonely ]

I wanted you to know that I love the way you laugh
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away
I keep your photograph; And I know it serves me well
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

Cause Im broken when I’m lonesome
And I don’t feel right when you’re gone away

you got away, you dont feel me anymore

The worst is over now and we can breathe again
I wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away
There’s so much left to learn, and no one left to fight
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

Cause Im broken when I’m open
And I dont feel like I am strong enough
Cause Im broken when I’m lonesome
And I dont feel right when you’re gone away

Cause Im broken when I’m open
And I dont feel like I am strong enough
Cause Im broken when I’m lonesome
And I dont feel right when you’re gone away

Torture Me

I'm the devil with the black dress on [26 Apr 2004|08:07pm]
[ mood | tired ]

checking out my ruin merchandise/jack off jill/scarling since my Bday is comeing up. but i dont want anyone to buy me anything im just posting this here so i can find it later incase i gots money.

(Lrg.)
found at.. http://www.myruin.com/merch/vamps.htm
lol i cant decide which i want.

2 Pleasure Victims_ Torture Me

You're looking colder .. [26 Apr 2004|07:36pm]
[ mood | cynical ]

Hm well not doing much right now but listening to Jack off Jill and searching for any Scarling Tour dates since JOJ broke up a few years ago. that sucks. o well. - i'd die if i got to see Jessicka. and i dont mean... "like omg!! i love u ! im ur biggest fan!" *faints* - sorta thing. i mean.. yeah itd be really kool because i admire her a lot. she has an awesome voice and amazing lyrics *laughs* :)
well here is a magazine cover of her in her band scarling.
anyone know tour dates please tell me

Torture Me

"For what city and state?" [25 Apr 2004|11:59am]
hm well suppose i'll update real quick
Just waiting for anthony to come over now. then we are going to ticket master to HOPEFULLY get his ticket for the avenged sevenfold concert:) YAY! then diana is picking us up at 2:30. i dont know the band that well let alone all the others but diana but me a ticket for my bday along with atreyu next month - which im very excited about:) so yeah we are going today. thank u diana! love u ! ..hmm i just got done ironing my hair.. my mom dyed it for me last night.. it didnt come out the blue i wanted but at least it wasnt $100+. next im doing purple. ooh yeah
i cant wait:) lol
well im in a better mood then last night as one of u may be able to tell. or two of u .depending on whom is reading this and whomever cares..
yeah
got in trouble last night though it was in no way my fault. but i wont argue..
and im sorry u were mad at me. hope ur not still..
anyways..
i took some pics on here for diana and chrissy to show them my hair so i will just post them here too :)


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4 Pleasure Victims_ Torture Me

well my bday is comeing up [23 Apr 2004|06:39am]
if anyone is curious as to what i want?.. lol
damn i need a job!! i wanna too much crap :(
$49.99

damnnnn! lol only $24!!!!:):):)

medium - $17.99

hurry its on clearence!! lol $16.98 - they only have size 10 left - my size!

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1 Pleasure Victims_ Torture Me

blah [16 Apr 2004|09:42pm]
[ mood | sore ]

hi everyone :-). just bored and took some pics.

for you ;-)

thats all for now
buh bye

8 Pleasure Victims_ Torture Me

hey ya'll look at mah new HURR!!.. [15 Apr 2004|08:34pm]
[ mood | tired ]

lol i went to the hair salon today...
5 hours and $100 later here it is ..
it cost so much cuz my hair is so long but oh well i love it
its a little shorter in the front (my bangs) its layered and cut at an angle. its black and blue streaks but u cant see the blue here. yup. well here it is ..
just some quick shots nothing special..


smile:)
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well thats all for now
talk to yall later lol
in the words of diaNUH..
buh bye!

2 Pleasure Victims_ Torture Me

I cant stop thinking about dj.. [13 Apr 2004|04:42pm]
[ mood | sad ]

Another day goes without any change
The feeling we live with still remains
We're stuck in a whole and we're searching for anything to hold on to
There has to be somewhere that we can be safe
From the lives we live each day
There has to be somewhere that we can be far away

We have to escape and I will go anywhere
If you just lead the way
Escape to a place where we'll be together
Together everyday
We have to escape

We could be living how we wanted to
Instead of doing things we're forced to do
With no one to tell us that we should be
Going through what they went through
There has to be some place that nobody knows
Somewhere we can only go
There has to be some place that we can be all alone

We have to escape and I will go anywhere
If you just lead the way
Escape to a place where we'll be together
Together everyday

We have to escape and I will go anywhere
If you just lead the way
Escape to a place where we'll be together
Together everyday
Oh, together everyday
Oh yeah

We have to escape
We have to escape

We have to escape and I will go anywhere
If you just lead the way
Escape to a place where we'll be together
Together everyday

We have to escape and I will go anywhere
If you just lead the way
Escape to a place where we'll be together
Together everyday
We have to escape

Torture Me

This brings me down so hard [13 Apr 2004|04:23pm]
[ mood | indescribable ]

i went to school today...
feeling so empty..
when dj was alive.. the past few weeks i didnt talk to him very often..
so today would have been like any other day.. but knowing that is really gone..
it hurts so much.
now that ive seen it happen (suicide/drug overdose) i could never do it. i wouldnt want anyone to feel the pain that i felt sitting there looking at his pale dead body..not to mention how his family felt.. at least the ones who cared. I miss him to much. ive cried so much throughout the day, so has sarah which suprised me. she has been down all day. i wish i could have done something more, i wish we had more time. i feel so horrible..his sister told my mom he used to talk about me all the time and that i was his first girlfriend when my mom mentioned who i was.
that made me feel even worse..that i couldnt say thank you for careing about me. but it also made me happy the fact that he did care and that he did talk to his sister about me..
still..
its so sad..
Towards the end of the service they played My Immortal by Evanescence.. it was the perfect song but i broke down right then.. i wanted to just grab him and wake him up.. bring him back to life and have him open his eyes and smile that he fooled everyone..but it wasnt going to happen. god dj... please come back!!!!:'( please dj. im sorry for everything i'll do anything. let me take your place. you did not deserve this...
At least though.. i have something to look forward to when i die,
meeting D.j again. for this sake i do hope there is a heaven.. im not religious and i dont care about religion because there are so many things to it ..but when u lose someone close to you..as in, they die.. you wonder where they are now.. what happens when they die..i hope he is alright and watching over those who care about him.
i miss him so much.
i love you dj, save me a seat.
Love Always and Forever,
Amanda
***************
R.I.P
D.J Acevedo
5/13/87 - 4/6/04
***************

10 Pleasure Victims_ Torture Me

[13 Apr 2004|06:11am]
well im about to go to school in a minute and i decided to put a little update in here. not much but here it goes. Chris came over thursday night and we went camping at Fort Wilderness in Orlando from friday to sunday. it was a lot of fun, we went water mousing and he just about killed me. sunday we went to MGM Studios and my mom bought us both a lot of nice things. Yesterday i didnt go to school because we came home late sunday and it was the day of Dj's Funeral. He dies tuesday of drug overdose i just found out thursday. i didnt cry when i found out because i was in shock... dj? gone? thats impossible..but when i saw him in his open casket it became a reality. he was so pale and looked so cold. not the friendly funny face im used to seeing on dj. i miss him so much. i wish i cud have done something more for him. im sorry i love u dj.
-amanda-
Torture Me

[10 Mar 2004|06:20pm]
Never Gonna Be The Same
by Courtney Love



Cut me up today
I Should've stood in your way
He lied

And everywhere a dream
Nothing came between
I died

Cut me away
I will not be for you
God comes down

Never gonna be the same
Never gonna be the same
Never gonna be the same

And if you wanted water
And if you wanted food
If you want shelter
I cannot come over to you

And if you want loove now
Or the needle and the spoon
You gotta show a little faith in me now, baby
I cant come over to you

Never gonna be the same
Never gonna be the same
God come on down

And if you want my heart out
Sittin by the bay
Well the sun went down tomorow
It will not come up today

And if you want my love now
And wrapped your arms so cruel
If theres a god its me now, baby
I cannot come over to you

Never gonna be the same
Just put me in your way
She lied

You gotta show a little faith
In your old rugged cross you made
What comes up it must go down
And down and down you cried

And if I wanted fame now
Or the glory of the womb
And if I wanted my name in places
Ill never lie to you

And if I wanted christ
Or a messiah by my side
I cant believe in anything
I know that Mary lied

I sent you up today
Couldve got in your way
Oh, Mary lied

Do you know?
Can you feel it?
Do you feel me?

And if you wanted madness
If you want whats pure
Well you gotta come over to me,baby
My light doesnt reach you

If you want a love
So unconditional and real
Youve gotta ride that black horse, baby
Through the depths of Hell that Ive been
Follow me away
Yeah though I walk

I will be the same
The strongest one thats made
Through the valley of life

Never gonna be the same
Goodnight, goodnight
Goodnight, goodnight
You'll never be the same.
Torture Me

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